If you are dating, inevitably you will end up on a bad date at some time. If you are a single dad or single mom dating, how can you avoid the situation or at least minimize the pain if you find yourself on a date gone wrong?
First, try to screen dates as much as possible before agreeing to meet. If you have been in a dry spell, you may be tempted to take a chance on about anyone. But, your time is valuable and you don’t want to waste it on someone who is clearly not suitable. If you met online, have several email or chat conversations before meeting as you can often weed out potential dates by asking questions. If someone is setting you up, find out why they think this person would be a good fit for you along with any other information that you can discover about him or her. Often, someone else’s idea of a great person to date may not coincide with yours.
Second, make the first meeting short. Dinner or even lunch is too much. You want to be able to make a quick exit if necessary, so meeting for a coffee is ideal. Then, if you don’t like the person, you can leave without feeling obligated to spend much of you time with them. Remember, if you like your date, you can always make another date to spend more time together.
If your date is being rude or you feel an uneasy feeling in the pit of your stomach (beyond the usual first date nerves), then leave immediately. Better to stand someone up than take a chance on someone who may be dangerous.
Have an exit line rehearsed before you arrive at your meeting place in case you do not like your date. That way, you do not have to worry about what to say if you do not never want to see the person again. Remember to offer a compliment as you convey the message such as “you seem like a great guy but I do not think we are compatible.”
Single parents often have a tendency to discuss their children since they are so much a part of our lives. Be very cautious about giving information that may make it easy someone to find you again. For example, your kid may play basketball and a natural question from your date might be for what school. Not thinking, you tell them, and now they know they can probably see you at the next game. Until you get a certain level of comfort with a new dating partner, ages and sexes of kids is probably enough information.
If your date is a decent person but just not attractive or interesting to you, be pleasant and try to find some conversation topics that are safe. Remember, you probably have not been the dream date for other people that you have met, and you need to treat the other person with respect.
Many people get extremely nervous when meeting someone for the first time. For example, your date may appear to be a little airheaded or clumsy. In this case, you might want to give the person another chance since they may be a great companion once they get over their nervousness.
If your date goes bad, remember that this happens to virtually every single parent who ventures into the dating scene. Shrug it off and move on to the next opportunity. Think of your single dad or single mom dating experiences as getting you one step closer to meeting your soulmate.
Dateable: Are You? Are They?
He’s Just Not That Into You: The No-Excuses Truth to Understanding Guys