Single Parent Dating - Should You Lie About Having Kids or Your Life Situation?

As a dating single parent, you have probably found potential dates who lost interest in you when they found out about your kids or other sensitive information. If you are out on the town and just spotted someone that you would like to get to know better, do you have to tell them you have kids or give information that you fear will reflect badly on you?

First, consider your motives. If you are just looking for a fling that you do not want to introduce to your kids, you may not have to tell him or her that you have children. In the same vein, stories of your strained relations with your ex or miserable financial situation don't have to be relayed, either.

If you decide not to tell, remember to guard your heart. If you happen to decide this person is the one, the news that you have kids or other realities about your life may bring the relationship to an abrupt end.

So you have decided not to tell, and your date asks you if you have kids. Now what? Lying is not recommended as you will probably eventually get found out, and you lose your integrity. You could take the noncommittal tactic and say that you have kids, but you don't involve them in your dating life. Some potential fling dates will be OK with this answer, as their main worry is getting in an uncomfortable situation when they are not planning a future with you and your kids.

If you are looking for long-term relationships, you need to be honest about your sitation. Of course, you do not want to share all of the gory details on your first several dates, but as the relationship grows, you need to gradually talk more about your life. You may lose potential mates by being honest, but these people were obviously not right for you if they cannot deal with your life circumstances.

Remember that everyone is not perfect, and your date has made mistakes, too. You may think that sharing information such as prior drug abuse or jail time will scare everyone off, but some people will give you a chance if you can show that you have made positive changes.

Honesty is really the best policy for single parent dating situations. You can find people to date who are accepting of your life situation and boundaries that you place around contact with your children.